I like Jokes......

Few of very-very funny jokes I want to write below. Please read it :

Banta: U cheated me. Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u. Banta: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says This is all India Radio! (New)

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Wife: aji sunte ho, kal meri Mammi aa rahi hai.
Husband: kyaa tumhare PaPa bhi unke sath aa rahe hai?
Wife: nahi, Par ye aap kyo puch rahe hai?
Husband: isliye ki Kitchen me meri madad ho jati. (New)

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Ek sardar apne marriage certificate ko 1 ghante se dekh raha tha
WIFE: tussi inni der se ki dekh rahe ho?
SARDAR: expiry date dhoond raha hu!!! (New)

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Gandhi Ji ahinsa ko kyun maante the
Kyun ki wo jante the ki

Dhishum
dhishum........

To Pepsodent ka kaam hai !!!!!!!! (New)

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Santa ke 20 sal bad bacha hua. Wo udash ho gaya.
Banta : Yaar udash kyo ho?
Santa : 20 sal baad bacha huwa wo bhi itna sa. (New)

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Santa said something in Banta’s ear, and Banta died.
Take a wild guess,what did he say…?

!!!…”Dhishkiyaon”…!!! (New)

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Doctor : Aap ka aur aapki biwi ka blood group ek hi hai?
Sardar : Hoga, jarur hoga; 25 saalse mera khoon jo pee rahi hai. (New)

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Santa : Ek wari main chota hunda si, main qutab minar to gir gaya si Banta": Phir bach gaya si k mar gaya si Santa": Pata nae odon main chota hunda si!!! (New)

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A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khediye.
Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoe paa ke hune aaya!!! (New)

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Sardarji opens his lunch box in the middle of the road....why? Just to confirm whether he is going to or coming back from theoffice. (New) :)

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Sardar jhad pe bethkar gaa rahe the, achanak ek sardar jhad se ulta latak ke gaane laga, dusre ne pucha ki ulta kyon latka ho, Sardar bola "oye side B gaa raha hun...."(New)

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Ek sardar sukhe khet mein boat chala raha tha.
2nd sardar "aise sardaro ne hi sardaron ka naam kharab kiya hai".
Agar mujhe swimming aati to jakar ussey bahut marta....(New)

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School Mein Ishq Ka Naya Mahool Tyar Ho Gaya,
Class Ki Teacher Ko Papu Se Pyar Ho Gaya.
Iss Baat Se Sari Class Ka Dil Udas Ho Gaya,
Sari Class Fail, Aur..... Papu Pass Ho Gaya....(New)

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Wife - Shaadi ki raat tumne jab mera ghunghat uthaya to kaisa laga.
Husband - Mein to maar hi jata agar mujhe Hanuman Chalisa na yaad hota...(New)

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Hamaare Dil ke arman aansuon me beh gaye,
Hum gali me thay gali me reh gaye.............
Kambakhat light chali gayi.........................
Jo baat unse kehni thi wo unki mummy se keh gaye.. (New)

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Teri aankain jhuki jhuki,
Tera chehra khila khila,
Jab tere chehre per haath ghumaya,
To aadha kilo fair and lovely mila...!!!!(New)

Jab dekha unhone tirchhi nazar se,
to hum madhosh ho gaye,
Par jab pata chala ki nazare hi tirchhi hai,
to hum behosh ho gaye... !!!!!!(New)

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Gulaab ko bhi Kamal bana dete,
Uski ek Ada pe Kai gazal bana dete...
Kambhakt marti nahi mujh par larkiyaan,
Warna LUCKNOW me bhi TAJMAHAL bana dete....(New)

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Two donkeys met at a wayside and got talking. One was a robust-looking fellow who was without a master; other a miserable-looking specimen who belonged to a brick-kiln owner. The robust fellow heehawed: "What is the matter with you? You look famished and woebegone." "My master is very cruel. He gives me very little to ear, loads me with hundreds of bricks and eats me with his stick." "So, why dont you run away and like me live off the fat of the land." The lean-thin donkey explained. "You see, my master has a very pretty daughter. He also beats and abuses her." "What is that to do with you?" "Everything he thrashes the girl, he says, "One of these days, I will marry you off to this donkey." "See, my job has better prospects."

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One day a sardarji was walking down a busy road when he realized a truck was headed right towards him. Trying to be on the safe side he moves off the road out of harms way but the truck veers right towards him. The scared sardarji jumped into the bushes to avoid the truck. As the truck passed by he stands up and starts crying. People gather around and ask him why he was crying when the truck had missed him. The sardarji replied that he was crying not because the truck missed him, but because behind the truck was the sign - 'Phir Milenge'! * - How does santa takes bath during winter? He stands in front of the mirror and throws water on the mirror.

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English Man : - Humare America mein War ho gaya hai.
Mohit: - Humare India mein to roz hi war hota hai.
English Man : - wo kaise? Mohit : - Somwar, Mangalwar, Budhwar.....!!!

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One evening a Sardarji starts from office to home with pushing his scooter manually. He met his friend on the way... Friend: why are you pushing your scooter manually? Sardarji: 'I forgot to bring the scooter key from my home. Friend: 'Is it! Then, How did you come to office from home in the morning?' Sardarji: 'I was pushing my scooter from home to office also in the morning.

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Kanjibhai was preparing wedding cards for their son at the printers. Kanjibhai was not very good at English so he asked the printer to help him. After the printer had presented Kanjibhai with a draft, Kanjibhai quickly pointed out that the " RSVP " was missing.
The printer was surprised by Kanjibhai's knowledge and asked him ifKanjibhai knew what it meant?
Kanjibhai started to think and after much thought he replied : "Vait! I remember! I remember! RSVP!! It means"Remember, Send Vedding Present!"